Negotiating with the Deer

I am getting ready--weeks ahead of the hostas--for the deer. Last year for the first time in 3 years, they came down the big wooded hill across the road and dined on my hostas, phlox, the tomatoes (!) and virtually anything young and green and full of nourishment. This is old news to many of my friends in Vermont. But I took it personally. Why me? Why now? Hadn't we had a nice relationship before? Why eat my plants just as I am really getting into gardening on this little lot?

The daffodils are just emerging. They are maybe 3" high right now. Usually deer ignore daffodils so I am not in a panic yet. But then I remember they ate the phlox and who would have expected that? I think it is time to take some steps.

Everyone has a sure-fire solution to preventing deer from dining in the yard. They all probably work, at least until the deer get wise. Coyote pee was popular when I lived in West Virginia. The idea is the deer sense a predator and move away. But then it rains and you have to spread the stuff again. And it is expensive. I am going to lean toward the do-it-once-and-hope-it-works kinds of solutions.
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First, fairy lights. I happen to have an abundance of little white lights (it's a long story). I don't begin to use them all on my Christmas trees. So I already have in inventory one weapon in the category of do-it-once. My plan is to skirt the beds with these strings of lights--just lay them on the ground at the edges of the beds. Plug them all together and into the big orange extension cord and then into the outlet on my little front porch. Bingo.

The back-up plan is Irish Spring soap. I have to figure out how to rig this up, but basically a chunk of the strong-smelling soap will hang from a string on a stick next to every possible plant of interest. When it rains, a little soap will wash off but if you have ever used that soap, you know the smell will live on, unlike the fake predator approach. For right now I am not going to get too obsessed about environmental impact.

We'll see what happens. It's not that I don't like the deer. I do sort of like knowing they are close (the neighborhood bear is another story). They are quiet and graceful and always look so startled when I drive down the driveway at night and find them hanging out. But there are limits. When I decided to move toward an edible landscape I also started to get more possessive about the plants. Now it's my food we are talking about.

Maybe this problem will just resolve itself over time. After all, the hosta lilies are not edible to me, so they will probably give way to something that is. Maybe I could move them to a spot where I can enjoy them but also go easy on the deer. After the initial deer repasts last year the hostas did grow back some. I did get to enjoy them eventually, a little. Maybe the deer got bored with them and that's when they moved on to the phlox and tomatoes.

It's just that in the early part of the spring, well, I am simply desperate to see something growing. I might even be open to a dialogue about the schedule. We could negotiate. Maybe the deer
could come by in August when I am starting to get sick of weeding and watering and help me out. I could be a lot more generous then. Heck, they could even have the zucchini by then. But, let's face it, when was zucchini a good bargaining chip? People who never lock their cars in Vermont start locking them in zucchini season for fear a friendly soul will leave some on the back seat.

No, I think I will just go with my two-part strategy. See what happens this year. Try to be chill. Put a big pot of pansies on the porch in the meantime to satisfy that need to see something growing.